*headdesk* MARKETING makes me wanna stab myself in the eye with an ice-pick! MARKETING makes me wanna bury people in my backyard...with a snorkel...because you know, they have to breathe! Oh MARKETING! It gives me hives, makes me break out in a cold sweat, makes me wanna puke, gives me major migraines - come to think of it, it's a lot like the flu...or...the plague. I'm gonna go with the plague! If it doesn't turn me into Gollum, it's gonna kill me. *whimpers in a dark corner*
In all seriousness, if you haven't noticed, it sucks monkey butt - in massive proportions. Why you ask? Because it is hard work and I just wanna write! Because it's self-involved and tedious! *sticks my tongue out like a child* Alas, it's a necessary EVIL!
Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my book, I LOVE the new ones I'm working on and I want to sing at the top of my lungs to the world, "I'm bringing vampires back" to the tune of "I'm bringing sexy back"! *chuckles* BUT, and here's a big but, (I'm not talking about mine!) I'm a writer, which means I'm an introvert. I like my bubble, it's safe and cozy in here and I have chocolate!
Build a social media platform, they say...get a blog and a Twitter account and a Facebook page and a website, they say...*twitches and develops Tourette's*...So I do, even though it makes me want to rock back and forth in a dark corner and cry like a little bish. Yeah, I said it! Now I find myself doing newspaper article interviews and setting up profiles on dozens of sites and doing giveaways and blankly staring at my Twitter page trying to tweet something that someone might find interesting *double headdesk*. Newsflash! No one cares about all the cute crap my kids do, except for me, which btw I find uber cute! What do they care about? Being entertained, right? Right!...I think...
So, where do I go from here? Time to upgrade to guest blogs, ads, newsletters, etc. Will it pay off? Jeezis, I hope so! And if not, well, I pushed myself out of my comfort zone and have done things I never dreamed I could...oh, and I did it all spam free! YAY me! *laughs then scurries back to my corner to join the voices in my head*